Violence in TV, Movies, and Video Games. If I had a child, I would not let him or her play violent video games (or maybe any video games)...especially the ones like "Call of Duty". For all the things said...it's violent, it shows that with a push of a button you can take a life, etc. There is another reason...it glorifies being in a war. At the same time it glorifies war, there are soldiers coming back in real coffins, and with real injuries, and real disabilities.
However, we are in a world where reality is violent. Grimm's Fairy Tales (a popular thing to read to children) are, well, Grimm. Jack fell down and broke his crown. Hansel and Gretel were siblings that were abandoned in a forest by their parents, and caught by an evil witch who fattened them up so she could eat them. In the Lion King, Mustafa is killed by his brother, and then blames Simba. Snow White is poisoned by a witch, and Bambi's mother is mowed down, Gaston falls from the roof of the castle after a violent fight with the Beast. I'm sure you get my drift. When I grew up, my favorite books were the Narnia Chronicles, The Hobbit, and Lord of the Rings...all full of violence.
And lets look at the latest kid book/movie series: Harry Potter. Do you know how many people that were close to Harry who were killed?? Here's who: His parents, Sirius Black, Dumbldore, Remus Lupin, Tonks, Fred Weasley, Cedric Diggory, Hedwig, Severus Snape, Mad Eye Moody, Dobby, Barty Couch Sr. Colin Crevey, and finally, Harry had to allow himself to be killed to destroy the last horcrux. It's just that these deaths were caused by wands and not guns.
And the last thing I would mention is the Bible. The Old Testament is nothing but war. The first half of Revelation scared the daylights out of me. Not to mention, the crucifixion.
Now what about music?? When I was a kid, Ozzy Osbourne and Judas Priest were both sued for wrongful death because some parents believed that there were "subliminal" messages in the music - or because they listened to that music - that caused their children to commit suicide. Both Ozzy and Judas Priest were cleared. And I can understand why the parents did it, they had to reach out in extreme pain and come up with the reason why their children were dead. The kids probably didn't confide in their parents, or they didn't recognize the signs. In their pain of losing their children, they had to blame somebody and they chose to target of the music their children listened too.
This prompted the PMRC...Parent's Music Resource Center. An organization organized by a bunch of Congressmen's wives with too much time on their hands. They wanted to ban certain types of music, but since they really couldn't do that, they went for labeling records. Luckily, I had a Mom that resented being told what music she should allow her kid to listen too. I'm sure if she listened to Guns N Roses' Appetite for Destruction that I got when I was 14, she might of thought differently. But then again, I was too sheltered to even know what those lyrics meant until I was an adult. But she ignored the labeling on the records, because she knew me well enough to know that it wouldn't effect me. And they got REALLY ridiculous. Def Leppard's album cover for "Pyromania" - and the name of the record, induced kids to go out and commit arson (really?). Bon Jovi had to change the cover of their Slippery When Wet album because the original was too sexually explicit. It really wasn't, but that's the control that they wielded back then. If the PMRC rejected something, the record companies jumped. They eventually went away. And people still listen to Ozzy, Judas Priest, Def Leppard, and Bon Jovi (namely me) without inciting violence or suicide.
You cannot keep violence out of what children see, read, or listen too. It is everywhere, including popular children's literature. How can you control what violence there is on TV, in movies, video games, books, and music for adults when there is so much in the classics that were written for children?
The mental illness issue should be SEPARATE from the whole gun issue. Not all gun violence...in fact, I would guess not a great percentage is because of a mental illness. HOWEVER, there NEEDS to be more comprehensive mental health coverage. A large percentage of the homeless are mentally ill, and some of them are veterans. Combat soldiers come home and commit suicide. Statistics show that most mentally ill people are the victims of gun violence, not the shooter.
Mental illness is just that - an ILLNESS. There are physical causes with chemical and hormonal imbalances and parts of the brain structurally wrong. I have known people that killed themselves, I have a person very close to me that tried and almost succeeded, and I have tried it a couple of times. They have statistics on how many people have died from cancer, heart disease, car crashes, etc. They have no statistics for how many people die from mental illness. That is because it is just lumped in with suicides. THIS NEEDS TO BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY!
There needs to be services for people who have mental health issues. Our insurance companies have cut visits to psychiatrists to 15 minutes for medication management. That is barely enough time for a person to talk to their doctor about symptoms, side effects, and how new medication will help them and what to expect.
All hospitals should have a psychiatric wing. The one that my doctor was affiliated with closed down to make more beds. If I should have to be hospitalized, I will be going to a hospital where there will be another doctor making decisions instead of the doctor that knows me best. There is something wrong when you can't have your doctor treat you in the hospital. Any medication changes can cause a spiral that actually makes it worse.
There needs to be more support groups...for the sufferer and the family and friends that have to live with or support the sufferer.
And there needs to be more awareness when it comes to kids developing symptoms. I started showing symptoms when I was 9 years old. I started responding to stress by mutilating myself...mostly cutting my arms. When I got towards middle school and high school, I was bullied terribly and the school psychologists were a joke. They knew I was cutting myself and did nothing, didn't recommend a doctor - nothing. I also started having severe asthma attacks regularly enough that I missed a lot of school. I ended up quitting at 17 and getting my GED.
And Mom was at her wit's end. She knew I needed help, but I was uninsured for pre-existing conditions, and she didn't know where to turn...except to the "professionals" that were at the school.
There has to be more comprehensive education about mental illness in schools and and in society in general. There is a terrible stigma associated with being mentally ill. And in school it can be traumatic. I was bullied horrifically in school. And I can tell you that the words "Sticks and Stones can break your bones but words can never hurt you" is NOT TRUE. Please, give me the broken bones! The way I was treated in school affects my thinking to this day. Everything that is said to me is taken personally...and cause problems like panic attacks. My self-esteem has severely been beaten up. If I do one thing wrong, I take it out on myself the hardest, which causes me to be more symptomatic. I have yet to figure out that I live in an adult world where people aren't as judgmental children are. These are all things I can trace back to how I felt when I was being bullied.
So this leads to schools needing to stop bullying. It is not "this is just a normal phase that kids go through". It is not. People need to recognize that being bullied like that during the developmental part of growing up is going to have effects that last a lifetime.
It is better than it was when I was a kid. But it needs to be better. Kids need to be taught to be accepting of their fellow classmates, whether they have mental problems, ADD, are mentally disabled, etc. They have to know that the things they do have consequences that can last the victim's entire life. The suicides of kids that were bullied should be a huge sign.
Ciao...
On December 14, 2012, my faith in humanity was shaken. I watched with shock and sadness as I listened to the news about a gunman who went into an Elementary School and shot and killed 20 first graders, between the ages 6-7, and 6 teachers/staff. I cannot imagine what those parents are going through. Those children had their whole lives in front of them. And for those children that survived, they will live with this tragedy forever, no matter how much therapy they receive, they will forever have the memories of that day seared in their brain. On December 14th, they lost their innocence.
My heart has been broken, and I feel guilty for having a "normal" life and the ability to feel joy when so many families have suffered their worst nightmare with Christmas next week.
The shooter, 20-year old Adam Lanza, had a history of Asperger's
(which I don't believe contributed to the shooting) and another mental problem. He went to gun stores in the days before but was turned down. So he got a hold of his mother's guns...and shot her in the face. He went to the school armed with a Bushmaster with a 30 bullet capacity, a glock 10mm caliber, a 9 mm sig sauer, and enough ammunition to kill everyone in the school and the first responders. And he broke in. God, I can't even imagine how scared those children must have been.
There are many questions. Mr. Lanza had the forethought to destroy his computer. But there is also the question of gun control and help for the mentally ill.
I AM NOT AGAINST THE 2nd AMENDMENT! But I do believe there is no reason why we have to have military assault weapons or the ammunition that goes with it. We do not need these type of weapons to protect ourselves or hunt. We need laws that make it MANDATORY that everyone purchasing a gun should go through an extensive background check, possibly a psychological exam before being able to get the gun. And the gun needs to be registered. I believe that if someone wants to get rid of their guns and sell them, they take them to a designated place where they are compensated, and the guns could be resold legally. There should be no gun shows...that is one of the major sources for illegal weapons. And those restrictions should be for online sales as well.
Does this mean that people aren't going to illegally acquire illegal weapons and ammunition? No, I realize that it won't stop mass shootings. Criminals are going to do what they do. And there probably isn't a law in this country that hasn't been broken. But this could make it harder to get a gun. If ONE life is saved because of laws for gun control being passed, then it is worth the trouble.
I just know that it shouldn't be harder to register to vote than it is to purchase a gun. 40% of guns purchased legally don't require background checks or registration. Yet you have to register to get a decongestant at the pharmacy so they know that you're not using it for a meth. lab. It's ridiculous.
AND PEOPLE NEED TO UNDERSTAND THAT WHAT PEOPLE WANT IS GUN CONTROL, NOT BANNING GUNS. It NEEDS to happen. We should not have to go through these weekly or monthly mass murders. We need to do something before it becomes so common that it doesn't bother people that it's happening.
Ciao,
Carrie
In 1993 I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. I had been symptomatic most of my life in someway. When I was around 10 years old, I started coping with stress by cutting my arms. When I got bullied at school, I had asthma attacks...most likely psychosomatic that kept me at home for the majority of the time. When I was 17, in my Junior year, I ended up quitting school and getting my GED. And by the way, that bullying never goes away. I always have a fear of being around new people, for fear that they will make fun of me, or that I will not fit in.
I knew I couldn't handle going to college, especially since I couldn't handle holding onto a job, so I started following rock bands around the country with friends. At first it was Slaughter, then Firehouse, and then Skid Row. I had fun (and no, I didn't sleep with any of the band members - preferring respect and integrity instead). They actually helped me with my self-esteem. The first time I met Slaughter, I had awful self-esteem. In fact, I actually thought that none of them would talk to me because I was overweight. When Tim Kelly came out and actually had a full conversation with me, I was shocked. Everyone in the band was like that, but Tim was the first. And the same was true with Firehouse and Skid Row. And I made LOTS of friends through music.
So when did things get REALLY bad for me? I decided to move away to Arizona. I moved in with a friend that had been a pen pal. I was not ready to move that far away from my Mom, and I felt lost. I didn't want to step on anyone's toes. My depression had started before I moved (in fact, I thought moving would change everything). After about a month, I wanted to kill myself...definitely suicidal. And I had it all planned out. Somehow Mom got me home safely. About a week or so later, she realized how bad things were, and called a Crisis Center in the county.
We discovered in our county that there was a lot of support for mental illness, and that if you couldn't pay, you'd still get treated. Wish we had known about that before, but God decided that wasn't in my plans. I started a long journey (that I'm still on). I was put on prozac - and many other medications. One of the hard things about mental illness is that it's hard to get the correct drug that works. And even when you hit that drug, it is not going to control the depression 100%, or it simply becomes ineffective.
I also attended an outpatient program, where I learned to control the cutting, skills that I would need in life, was able to get on disability, and met people who were like me. That was a year long. After that, I entered a job program, and an independent living program. After completing these two programs, I was able to eventually get my own apartment for four years, and I found a job as a vet assistant, a job that I also kept for four years. Since then, I've gone through many psychiatrists (some bad, some excellent), and medications (some good, some bad).
So what is it like to be bipolar for me? Even when things are going alright in my opinion I still do things that are a part of it. I stay in...don't like leaving the house very often. Usually concerts will get me out, a trip to the beach, time with friends, etc. And I volunteer for a reptile group as Secretary (yes, I have reptiles). However, if I had my way, I would not leave the house. If Mom is not home, I will run and hide if I see someone come to the door, turn the TV volume down, and the light as low as I can get it. Usually I just go in my room. And I DON'T like answering the phone...or making phone calls. If Mom isn't home, everything goes to voicemail. I don't even have a phone in my room currently.
If it gets to where there are too many things planned, or things stack up on me, I stress out. When I stress out, I shut down and stay inside, pace, stay in bed and basically have a panic attack. Even if the things that are planned are fun. In September of 2011, I had 4 concerts planned...all within a week. And I had been extremely depressed since July. Too me, this was just too much for me to do. I started obsessing about it and how I was going to do it. Tickets were paid for so I had to go, and I got through it, but it took a lot out of me. The hardest part is that friends that don't understand tell me that what I've got planned is stuff that is fun. I LOVE going to concerts. But I get paranoid and anxious about events beforehand. I'm also notorious for cancelling appointments as well.
Most of the time, I wake up everyday thinking that things in life would be so much better for my family and friends if I was never born...or died when I was a baby (I was born with a heart defect). And that thought is ALWAYS in the back of my mind. When I lived in Illinois, I was able to work without it affecting my health benefits. But Florida has different policies and I can't get a job. I moved down here with two job offers. This gives me plenty of time at home. I have strange sleeping hours. Sometimes I stay up all night, sometimes I go to bed early and get up early. No matter if I sleep all night, I take long naps, and of course, if I'm up all night, I sleep all day. My doctor tried changing my circadian (sleep) rhythm and played with my meds. That ended up in me getting two hours of sleep a night. The computer is my lifeline to the outside world.
By the way, I learned to channel my cutting into doing something else that occupies my mind. Whether that is reading, journaling, listening to music (Bon Jovi is my absolute perfect pick me up band). Not that I don't still cut, because every once in awhile I do.
When I'm depressed, I'm apathetic, easily irritated, sleepy, and as a friend calls me, a "Negative Nelly". And I've shut down where I don't want to go anywhere. And there is no rhyme or reason for my depressive episodes. I don't see a "manic" side to me, but my Mom thinks that my manic episodes are when I start liking something (Bulls basketball, NASCAR or a band), and get OBSESSED with it. Having to have everything on the spot on the subject of my obsession. I think that she is right about that. This would be beyond the normal worry and obsessions I deal with everyday.
Right now, I would say that I'm swinging towards depression...hence the rambling here.
Oh, I also tend to take things out of context, get sensitive about it, or totally miss the point the person who is talking to me is trying to say. With Mom, this ends in an argument, and with friends, I usually don't say anything, but get upset and confused.
I'm on disability, like I said, and will probably be on it the rest of my life. Mental Illness is real, and having someone tell me to pick myself up by my bootstraps, get over it, or look at what you have DOES NOT HELP when one is deep in the whole of depression. In fact, I can take everything said to me to turn it around to where it is from my own skewed depressive point of view and fits into my self-incrimination and reasons why I'm a failure.
Though I often feel like I'm wasting someone else's oxygen and have done nothing redeeming in my life, I can tell you that I'm not a slacker. I really can't handle normal things in life like going someplace every day to make money. Believe me, I wish I could. It might make me feel that I'm worth something.
With that, please keep these things in mind when you deal with someone with a mental illness.
Ciao...
This election season has been awful. I don't remember things ever being as nasty as this one was...of course, I'm pretty young. The first president I voted for was President Clinton. But I suppose with social networks and blogs, everyone has an opinion and things spread like rapid fire on the Internet.
And my problem with what happened this election was that people (doesn't matter what party) watched particular news stations...liberal or conservative, and believed wholesale what they reported. There is no questioning, there is only acceptance of whatever is said. We have had faulty reporting since there was reporting. We have had opinionated reporting since there was reporting. During the times of Lincoln, reporting was not based on facts, but on whether the paper or reporter leaned a certain way. A Democratic leaning paper would make up things about how great the Democrats did, and then you would read the same account in a Whig or Republican leaning paper and it wasn't anything like the other. We are way beyond where we should believe what the press says...or what politicians are saying, without thought or questions. Yet, people believed it without question...
And that is sad.
And then there is Facebook and Twitter. Everyone follows political groups that are for what your beliefs are. That stands to reason. But just because that group posts some picture or message DOES NOT MAKE IT TRUE!!
Before I re-post something, I research it. I made sure that what I posted was factual. I also try hard to make sure that I never re-post things that are critical of Republicans - just the candidates and their policies. I was careful to try and respect my friends and family that were Republicans that I wasn't against them, but I didn't agree with their politics. And I hope that I was able to do that without insulting anyone. And if I did insult anyone, I apologize.
And I always fact-check what my Republicans friends were posting. And like my groups, a lot of what they said was not based on facts, or were outright lies. I'm sure that I frustrated a lot of my friends because I would post what the facts were.
So I ask everyone to learn again. Don't fall into the hole of believing everything you read or hear, because most of it probably isn't true. If you're going to be making a decision on how this country is run, it's doubly important to do that. Question EVERYTHING. Research EVERYTHING. We are no longer in the 1800's and reading partisan newspapers. We have this wonderful thing called the Internet, and you can do searches and learn amazing things. And if you put a little of effort into it, you can dig up the truth...or find differing views that might change your perception of something. I'm not just talking about politics here, I'm talking about EVERYTHING!
It is a never-ending frustration of mine that people don't educate themselves like they should...and then wonder why we aren't #1 in the education department. If we aren't going to question, research, and learn, how can we expect our children to do it?
~Ciao...
At the end of April, a friend that I had only known on Facebook that lives in my state asked if I could pick her up from the airport and take her home at the end of May. I agreed, even though it would take two hours to get to the airport (add an extra hour for traffic, etc.), two hours to her house, and somewhere between 4 and 5 hours to get home. HOWEVER, five days before I was to pick her up, some old family friends needed our help on that same day for a medical emergency. Mr. C had to have open heart surgery. What were we supposed to say or do?? Needless to say, I needed to cancel picking her up, and I gave her plenty of time to come up with an alternative way to get home. I thought she would be understanding.
I was wrong. Instead of "I'm sorry, I hope things go well for your friends" or "I understand completely" I got a snarky "Thanks, now I have no way to get home" and then something about learning a lesson about not depending on somebody she has never met. Then she went on about how she ALWAYS keeps her commitments. I tried to be calm and explain things to her. After all, I could imagine that she was upset and wondering what to do. I TRY to be nice after all. I ended up telling her that I was offended and disgusted by the way she was acting.
But what I really wanted to say was that she was being selfish, only thinking of herself. And that gee, there's no concern for Mr. C, who was having the surgery, and Mrs. C, that had to deal with a difficult thing. I wanted to call her a narcissist and a hypocrite. Where does hypocrite come in? She is always quoting the Bible, posting religious postings, and basically thinks her shit doesn't stink. However, when it came to a situation where she should've shown her Christian charity, she didn't. She thought of herself. Not even offering to pray for our friends.
If the situation had been reversed..yeah, I would be a little panicked about how I was going to get home, however, I would not only not be upset about WHY the person had to cancel, I would UNDERSTAND, and offer my prayers and tell them to keep in touch with me on how their friends are doing.
Needless to say, we are no longer friends on Facebook. She unfriended me, and then I blocked her. And that is the FIRST person that I've been friends with who I had to block since joining Facebook in 2008.
I know that I'm probably over reacting..I have a tendency to do that (sometime I will write a novel on life with bipolar), and I know that not everyone is perfect. But she had plenty of time to ask about Mr. C's health or to apologize and offer prayers. It was rude.
So I decided to get it out here...and then just let it go. I had to vent with someone other than my Mom, since I only vent to her and she is just slightly tired of it (understatement)
Sorry so long from last blog...but I'm sure I'll be writing more.
Ciao,
Carrie
I suppose it should only be a matter of time before I wrote a blog on the addition of 4 species to the Lacey Act, going into affect on March 23, 2012. The snakes in the ban are the Burmese python, northern African rock python, southern African rock python, and the yellow anaconda. The 5 that were not listed, but expected to be added soon are the green anaconda, reticulated python, boa constrictor, De Schauensee’s anaconda, and the Beni anaconda (I have never even heard of the last two species until this came up. If anyone has seen these snakes in the pet trade in the United States, drop me a line!)
The Lacey Act makes it illegal to import the four species into the United States (something I don't have a problem with.) It also makes it illegal to cross state lines with these animals. In fact, it is a FELONY to do so - for EACH STATE LINE YOU CROSS. That means, if you take your Burmese python from Florida to North Carolina...you have committed felonies for crossing the state lines for Florida, Georgia, South Carolina, and North Carolina. The economic impact on the business is obvious and I will discuss later. First I'm going to talk about something near and dear to me...the responsible pet owner and how we got screwed just as badly.
I am the proud owner of three snakes. A 3 ft. ball python (Ralphie), a 2 ft. rosy boa (Jamie), and a 1 ft. Kenyan sand boa (Elliott). I don't keep them for breeding, I keep them because I love snakes and, particularly, love them. I keep them in locked cages, make sure they have the right habitat and heating. I take them out and love watching their gracefulness and their beauty. And yes, they do have personalities. Ralphie loves to wrap himself around my neck like a choker (but that's not what he's doing), and is afraid of live rodents. Jamie is super curious, a bit of a nipper, and LOVES to eat...often eating something that is WAY to big for her. And I love how Elliott sticks his head out of the sand to where I only see his shovel-like nose and his eyes. When I take him out, he moves about curiously, but I know it's time to put him back in his tank when he starts to burrow into whatever he is on. And unless I could not properly care for them anymore, they are with me until God decides to call them home.
Fortunately, my snakes aren't on the Lacey Act list (yet). But many other responsible pet owners' snakes are. Snakes can be very long lived animals. My ball python can live over 40 years. The other two around 30 years. Someone could legally and responsibly own a Burmese python in Florida for decades...and heaven forbid if he should have to move, looking for a job, family issues, etc. Because that snake, who has been in his care for decades CAN'T go with him. There's an emotional attachment to this animal. At this point, the owner has five choices. 1. Can find a home for the snake (which can be hard with Florida's own reptile bans) 2. Have it euthanized (remember...a beloved pet and it loses it's life over some stupid law.) 3. Let it loose (the reason for the law being passed in the first place.) or 4. Take the snake with you no matter what. And you can be caught, prosecuted for a felony, possibly face jail time, definitely a fine, AND you beloved pet is euthanized or 5. Choose to stay in Florida no matter what...even if it means you can't find that job or have to turn down an offer.
My question is why? Why are responsible snake owners being punished for having snakes? The Lacey Act says it's because the snake is "injurious to wildlife." Burmese pythons are found in 3 COUNTIES in Southern Florida. That is all. And yes, I agree, they shouldn't be there and something should be done. But punishing our responsible snake owners has nothing to do with it. It has been scientifically proven that these snakes can only survive in southern Florida and southern Texas. And there aren't any in Texas. So let Florida handle the problem, and leave the tens of thousands of responsible snake owners be!
Maybe some of you are thinking that they are still dangerous. No, frankly, they're not. A well fed, well cared for Burmese python is nothing but a gentle giant. I've handled a beautiful albino 17 ft. Burmese python at a show once, and she was absolutely tame. Have pictures to prove it. There are statistics to back this up. In 2010, 34 people were killed by dogs. Between 1990-2008, only 8 people were killed by constrictors. On average, 50 people are killed by horses, dogs, and cats. And snakes? One person is killed every other year. Yet you don't see dogs, cats, and horses illegal to cross state lines for being dangerous. Think about it.
The bottom line is that there will be a lot of snakes either killed or let loose.
And I can't help but feel for the breeders either. Many of which runs their business as a primary business. Some of these snakes are worth thousands of dollars. On March 23rd, those snakes will be worth $0 to sell. And the breeders are still going to be responsible for their care and for feeding them. With what money will they be able to do this? They will have to support their families and pay bills...and their business just went belly up. In Florida, they can't even sell them to anybody who doesn't have a commercial license to own the snakes, and they are in the same boat. What are their choices? To kill the snakes that they have, for one. They started breeding these snakes out of love for the species...and now they have to kill them, or do something else, in order to survive.
I know someone who breeds boa constrictors. They aren't on the current list, but I'm sure that they will eventually be listed. He fed his baby boa constrictors (one of the most popular snakes found at shows and often seen in the media) to his kingsnakes (kingsnakes eat other snakes). Is that right?
And what really makes me angry is that the politicians listened to the Humane Society of United States lobbyists and used a faulty study done by the US Geological Survey that isn't even classified as scientific. However, there have been PLENTY of studies, considered scientific, that has disputed what the USGS says. And is it just me, or isn't it fishy that the US Geological Society, who studies earthquakes and the like, did a study on pythons??
Yes, the Humane Society of the United States, our "Champions for animal rights" is behind something that will kill thousands of animals or cause the populations of invasive snakes in the Everglades to go up. And this will be after the fact that the last two winters killed a majority of the snakes down there.
I hope it's not too late to challenge this law... http://www.usark.org is trying to raise the money to go to court on it. And I really hope that they succeed. However, it's going to take a lot of money, and they need donations.
The toll this law takes on pet owners and breeders is going to be astounding. I signed the petitions, I called and emailed my representatives, and I've called the media to talk to them about doing a more unbiased approach the laws. All for naught. And now all I can do is pray for each person that loses their pets, every breeder who is out of a job and has to get rid of their animals, and every animal that loses their lives over this calamity.
Ciao,
Carrie
