There is one simple thing that we can do to make this place so much better, and I really do mean "simple."
Don't call people names.
The definition of name-calling is "a false accusation of an offense or a malicious representation of someone's words or actions."
It is also known as verbal abuse. And verbal abuse is the main component of both domestic abuse and bullying. It destroys a person's self-worth, confidence, the ability to trust and so much more.
Remember that little rhyme "Sticks and stones can break my bones but words will never hurt me?" It is completely false. Physical injuries heal. There may be a residual pain, but it will never hurt like it did in the beginning. Verbal abuse, however, does have the ability to hurt as badly years later as it did in the beginning. It alters everything in a person's life.
I'm also including celebrities here. What's wrong with that? Plenty. Words have power, and while you can certainly have an opinion about them and what they do, it is wrong to jump to the conclusion that they deserve to be called names. First of all, the problem is usually with something the celebrity said or did. And it is normal to object to that. "I don't like what he did. It's wrong and greedy." as opposed to "What an idiot. He's such an imbecile to do that." The first was an objection to the action. The second was in objection to the person. An action that was taken by the celebrity is tangible. You can see what he or she has done and come to an opinion about that. To "object to the person" is anything but tangible. What do we know about them? There's the image that was created for them just by being a celebrity. Behind that image, there is the image that we all put forth to the world, the person who you really are with your family and friends, and the secret one that only you know. People love to say that they "know" celebrities, but really, they don't. The celebrity has an entire lifetime of experiences, friends, family, thoughts, morals, and personal beliefs that we know NOTHING about them. We don't know the motives behind their action that was strongly objected too. All that is really correct to say is that you don't like what he did or said. To call celebrities names is merely judging a person you don't know because they are celebrities. And thou shalt not judge.
Another reason to not insult celebrities are the consequences. There is one for everything you do. On social media, you never know who is reading. Hateful words can turn into hateful actions.
Celebrities need to be more careful as well. Trump is in the process to being sued for inciting violence at a rally during his campaign that ended with a Trump protestor being beaten by supporters who listened to what he said. One of the supporters who beat this man admitted that he would not have done it if not for Trump's words.
Today, as I type, Trump tweeted something horrible about two morning news hosts on MSNBC - the woman getting the worse of it. These are two well-respected people, and there has been not only outrage from the media, but from both the House of Representatives and the Senate as well. And those responses? They are condemning his actions. "It's not appropriate." "It's beneath his office." "It's not presidential." Yes, of course, there are insults but most politicians and media seem to think that he should be held accountable for this action. That this action is offensive.
Consequence. I said that there is always one, and we need to consider them too when it comes to our behavior. Think about how many cases of road rage there are. They began with insults and name calling. It is also a reflection of who a person is. There is an over-burgeoning problem in society with name-calling and insults that are cruel and crude. If it bothers you that this goes on in society, then turn inward to look and see how you talk and react. One less voice in the din that is now our common discourse is a substantial improvement that will affect every single person around you.
People also need to look at why they are treating another person in this manner. It is completely possible to react to another's actions or words without calling them something insulting. It can also create a discourse where people learn new ideas or thinking and all benefit. In To Kill A Mockingbird, Atticus told Scout after a difficult first day of school to try and walk around in their skin. She did as he suggested and realized that the people she was holding to blame actually didn't really deserve it.
People don't have to agree with everything that is said. Or even like the person. And that can be expressed without resorting to insults. I have been in situations where I didn't like the person, and they knew it. But I was NEVER rude to them when I was around them, nor did I on the computer. Nor will I. Just because I don't like a person doesn't mean I should disrespect them. Whether I know them or not or whether they are public figures or not. People should be treated with respect.
No, I'm far from perfect. In the heat of the moment or without thinking I will say the first thing that comes to mind. And afterward, I always regret it, and if I can, apologize. It's the adult thing to do.
Let's face it, name-calling is just toxic. An illogical way to react to a situation where the only one that looks bad is the person who name-called.
Let's touch more on how much just simply calling a person a name can affect people.
There is scientific evidence that children bullied or called names affect them for a lifetime psychologically and emotionally. Abuse is not just physical, it is also emotional, and insulting is considered emotional abuse. When a child is insulted, it chips away at their self-esteem. It should also be noted that emotional abuse is considered a "silent epidemic" that harms millions. In fact, considering what is acceptable in this society, there are probably very few that haven't experienced emotional abuse.
So what happens to an emotionally abused child? First off, which name called and with each insult, it chips away at a child's self-esteem and self-worth...if it's bad enough, it can seriously undermine their lives far into adulthood, leaving a person to feel so worthless or unloved, they question their place in this world. This could lead to not only depression and suicide but self-destructive behavior such as drug and alcohol use.
Or it can have an opposite effect. Instead, there is an angry child who thinks it's okay to treat others as he or she is treated, and misbehaves on purpose as a form of protest (or to get attention.) They also cannot trust easily, especially the person committing the emotional abuse. Not only will they not respect them, they will probably hate them. Hate = the worst four-letter word you can use when using it against another human being. The last thing this world needs is another person that feels extreme hate toward another. It is too easy to spread.
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| No person deserves to feel worthless |
The best way to show a child that it is wrong? PRACTICE WHAT YOU TEACH! And if the adult in the child's life should happen to call them a name...apologize, and explain that it is never all right to call a person a name. What was said was a mistake.
For someone being called names, it violates their need for security, their need to be accepted and loved. It can put their entire foundation of who they are in jeopardy. They begin to doubt their self-worth. And I don't understand why people would want to put loved ones through that pain.
Psychologically speaking, people who resort to name calling has feelings of inferiority and inadequacy who needs to name-call to make themselves feel they are better than others. It also speaks to how very little thought has gone into the situation and how little regard they have for the outcome. There is no resolution. A resolution was taken away the minute that the insults started, the intelligent discussion was ended and they are clearly stating that they didn't want a resolution.
Name-calling is a label designed to hurt another person or cast them to look like they're incompetent, stupid, etc.
Finally, I want to say to sit and think about something. How does it feel when you get a compliment? And how does it feel when you're called names or insulted? Your answer should determine how you treat your fellow human beings.
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